DISCOVER YOUR ENM STYLE
Exploring opening your relationship? Here’s where to start.
Discover your ENM style then get a personalized roadmap for navigating the first few months with confidence.
A clear starting point. No judgment. At your pace.
So you’re exploring non-monogamy…
Maybe you've talked about it. Maybe you have some ideas and you're excited. But once you start looking into ENM, there are a lot of unknowns:
*
Are we looking for swinging, polyamory, a hotwife dynamic, or something else?
Finding the right people feels impossible…
*
*
How do we explore without hurting each other?
What are the mistakes we must avoid?
We’ve said yes…but what do we actually DO now?!
*
*
WHAT YOU GET FROM THE FREE QUIZ?
In about two minutes, you'll have your personalized ENM profile.
Your top 3 styles.
Your strongest ENM matches, drawn from 10 common styles.
From The Lifestyle to monogamish, polyamory to hotwifing, and more.
Clear definitions.
Take it separately as a couple, then compare results. It's often a far easier first conversation than starting from a blank page.
A conversation starter.
Learn what each style actually means plain-language clarity, beyond the stereotypes and internet confusion, including where people commonly mix them up.
The quiz helps you understand your desires. The roadmap helps you turn that understanding into real-life choices.
HOW IT WORKS?
Step 1: Take the free quiz
21 questions about how you connect, what you're curious about, and what matters to you. No wrong answers, and no knowledge or prior experience needed.
Step 2: Get your top 3 styles
Your top 3 matches, explained in plain language from 10 popular styles of ENM. Free, private, yours to keep.
Step 3: Get your roadmap (optional)
Once you know your style, the real question arrives: "Okay… how do we actually do this?"
Your personalized roadmap walks you through exactly that, where people with your style connect (the specific apps and communities to join), the conversations to have first, the mistakes to avoid, and how to explore at a pace that protects trust in your partnership.
The quiz gives you clarity. The roadmap gives you confidence and your first concrete steps.
Explore the ENM styles
There's more than one way to do ENM and most people don't fit neatly into one label.
ENM isn't a single thing. Different people are drawn to different structures, different levels of intimacy, and different kinds of connection. This quiz explores a full range of relationship styles:
-
![]()
Exploring
Curious and open-minded, you’re interested in discovering what ENM might look like for you without committing to a single path.
-
![]()
Open Relationship
Committed to a central partnership, with room to explore outside connections while keeping honesty, stability, and the relationship firmly grounded.
-
![]()
Swinging / The Lifestyle
Drawn to shared sexual exploration, social chemistry, and playful adventure, with fun, novelty, and couple-based experiences.
-
![]()
Hotwife / Stag & Vixen
Turned on by her exploration with others, where shared consent, pride, excitement, and reconnection deepen intimacy within the relationship.
-
![]()
Cuckolding
Aroused by consensual power exchange, where her exploration with others connects with surrender, humiliation, erotic intensity, and psychological thrill.
-
![]()
Polyamory
Open to loving more than one person, with emotional connection, honesty, and the depth of multiple meaningful relationships all mattering.
-
![]()
Hierarchical Polyamory
Interested in multiple loving relationships, while keeping one partnership as the anchor for long term commitment and security.
-
![]()
Solo Polyamory
Values meaningful relationships without a primary partner, keeping independence, autonomy, and a self-directed life at the center of everything.
-
![]()
Relationship Anarchy
Prefers each relationship built on its own terms, rejecting default rules and valuing freedom, intention, and nontraditional connection equally.
-
![]()
Monogamish
Mostly monogamous, but open to occasional agreed exceptions that add spark, flexibility, and play without changing the core relationship.
-
![]()
Mono/Poly
One partner explores outside relationships while the other remains monogamous, supported by trust, generosity, and strong communication.
WHY TRUST ME?
I've created this resource so people can explore new and exciting ways to connect in a way that protects their bond.
I'm Chloe, relationship coach and founder of Swoon. For 14 years, I've been in a deeply loving, open, and committed partnership with my husband, Michel.
People often tell us, "I'd love something like that, but I'd struggle with jealousy," or "I wouldn't even know where to begin."
So I started helping people explore intimacy, communication, and relationship design with honesty and zero judgment.
This quiz is the starting point I wish everyone had before they began: warm, clear, and shame-free, built to help you make sense of the questions you've been carrying and figure out what comes next.
Frequently Asked Questions
-
Take it separately first. Your honest answers matter more than matching answers and comparing results afterward is where the real conversation starts.
-
Absolutely. The quiz helps you get clear on your style, and your roadmap gives you the concrete next steps, the apps, the conversations, and the common mistakes to skip, so you can enjoy the adventure without making rookie mistakes.
-
Especially for you. You don't need to have done anything to take this quiz. It's built for exactly the question you've been sitting with, at your pace.
-
Yes, genuinely. Your top 3 styles and what each one means, completely free. If you want your personalized roadmap afterward, the step-by-step of how to actually start, that part's paid, completely optional, and priced to be affordable. No pitch mid-quiz.
-
No. The quiz stands on its own. Some people just want clarity and a conversation start that's enough, and it's free. Others want support turning that clarity into action, and that's what the roadmap is for.
-
21 questions, about 2–5 minutes. You can pause and come back.
-
Yes. Your answers and results are yours alone. We never share your information, emails from us arrive discreetly, and you can unsubscribe anytime.
Ready to understand what kind of ENM fits you?
Take the free quiz and discover your ENM style in under five minutes. Shame-free, judgment-free, and created by a coach who's lived this work for 14 years.